When does Yak get back?

Houghton On The Hill 4th XI V Fleckney 2nd XI

What do points make? Prizes! Or league position so you can feel morally superior to other teams around you for about 7 days. Yes, league cricket is back.

The 2’s made the relatively short hop to Houghton. A scenic short of place with a chocolate box setting and a team of developing players awaiting the Fleckney second string. They also provided a league qualified umpire who strictly adhered to the legside wide rule ( as an Umpire absolutely should) but the resulting wides on both sides resulted in a 7:15pm finish, a game longer than Dirk Digglers appendage.

The stand up in skipper won the toss and took his patched up side into the field. Holiday weekend led to limited availability and if you were a club member over 12 years of age with a pulse you had a decent shout of a selectoral ‘nod’.

It was a bit blowy at Houghton, as in enough wind provided by the almighty that might have reflected the after effects of a mushy pea banquet beyond the Pearly Gates.

Most struggled but Fergus was magnificent opening the bowling, he was though utterly without good fortune. He couldn’t have won the lottery today if he had bought every ticket and promised the adjudicator a cozy candle lit dinner at the Ritz.

Catches were not taken. Some admittedly more difficult than others , Chris Weir just missing a full length stretch grab and the keeper who otherwise couldn’t have stopped a pig in a passage a reflex grab with his left hand. Other times the ball just landed safe when it seemed it must surely fall into a Fleckney lap. Houghton did bat well but a Fleckney rally did restrict them to 221.

The drizzle eventually abated and the Fleckney reply began. Tanzeer on club debut batted patiently for a well crafted 34. Cameos elsewhere saw Fleckney at 77 for 5, respectable but with no foreseeable route to victory. At this point Chris Weir presumably said,” Hold my beer!”.

Over the next hour or so Weir Snr and Jnr put on 111 for the 6th wicket. Fergus playing with great application to support his Dad who was moving through the gears from sedate to bish bosh bash premium channel.

Fergus fell for 18 with the miracle certainly possible. He ran off barely acknowledging the applause of his teammates. Modesty? Nope, he ruined the illusion by sprinting passed his teammates with immortal words, “I REALLY need the toilet”.

Chris motored to 94 and within 3 more scoring shots of victory when he too fell, thankfully not in such a rush to use the facilities so he could draw the acclaim his efforts absolutely warranted.

Despite some fearless willow swinging from Tom Fleckney fell just 11 short. Galling? Perhaps a little but the ride was perhaps worth the fall. A team more patched up than Katie Price after her latest surgical procedure had nearly pulled of a win that scarcely look on until near the end.

Stronger teams will doubtless be put out this season but few will have the fun this XI did. League points? That’s for another day.